We become what we pray

When I received the invite from the Office of University Development and Alumni Affairs (OUDAA) to the revival of the Workshop on Ignatian Spirituality and Parenting (WISP), I felt it was a manifestation that truly, ‘When God calls, He enables.’ In previous years, co-parents in Ateneo spoke about it as a spiritual formation program for parents at the Basic Education units. The scenic view around the Loyola Retreat House in Angono, Rizal witnessed how I, together with my co-parent participants, agreed that WISP is a requisite to Ignatian parenting. It rendered itself as a spiritual journey aimed at deepening one’s friendship with the Lord. A meaningful experience of reflection, connection, and growth. A spiritual playbook facilitated by enriching resource speakers poised at living out one’s spirituality. A launch pad to intentionally guide formators of the future ‘men and women for others’ in the midst of life’s superficiality and pluralism of choices. A sandbox of learning in the presence of Jesuit rockstars, no less: Fathers Bert Ampil, Kit Bautista and Mon Bautista, SJ.

I learned that the journey of studying and integrating the concepts of Ignatian spirituality and parenting begins with knowing and embracing oneself. It describes what kind of relationship I have with God and how I respond to His call. In the workshop, we poured our hearts about what motivates and challenges us as parents. I realized that the common energy driving us forward relates to our desire to become better at parenting, responsive to change, and earnest to become ‘force for the greater good.'

The mix of storytelling and guided reflections prepared our minds to dive deep foremost into Ignatian spirituality which sits at the heart of educational mission i.e. the life story of St. Ignatius of Loyola and his first companions, his personal situation and historical context, his primary religious and conversion experiences defining his personal journey with God, his devotion to Our Lady, his written works, mission and service. How these elements weave into the quality of Jesuit education reaffirmed our decision to send our children to the Ateneo. Also, we understood that holistic formation extends beyond the campus, to our home and the bigger community. Whilst I can be spiritualized by my son, I can likewise undertake parallel measures to build my parenting vocation, i.e. taking the WISP as a starting point. For it to be holistic and committed to growth and development, I need to be empowered as a co-formator, likened to a hummingbird that flits in and out of its nest, allowing my children to explore and make decisions independently. Using a balanced approach that focuses on fostering independence, allowing for age-appropriate risk, and encouraging children to learn from their mistakes. 

Now as a WISParent, I am happier and more confident in interiorizing the Ignatian tradition of spirituality. I wake up each day with a clear and simple roadmap inspired by Ignatian ideals and the grace of the Spirit. On one hand, I have allocated time for prayer and reflection activities that seek to deepen my relationship with God and live more in accordance with His will. On another hand, I have increased intentionality and discernment in parenting and being ‘present’ for my children, my wife, and everyone in the village. As they say, ‘It takes a village to raise a child.’ Mindful that everything I am echoes in who they become.

As for my co-WISParents, we are collectively committed to ‘go forth and set the world on fire’ as the Ignatian Hummingbird Society (IHS). May we eventually become what we pray for and be Christ-like loving parents, the Ignatian way.