How I fell in love with the Holy Mass

Thanks to Ateneo and the Jesuits, I fell in love with the Mass. My love story with the Holy Eucharist started in Ateneo High School (AHS). It was a beautiful process, four years in the making. In God's perfect time, it bloomed into a deep relationship. By the time I graduated from AHS, the Mass for me was more than a sacrament. It was my date time with the Lord. And Jesus was more than God. He was Kuya Jess to me.

Our classes back then started at 8:00 am. I was already in school as early as 7:00 am. To make good use of my time, I started attending the 7:20 am daily mass at the St Stanislaus Kostka Chapel.

Initially, it was my way to quiet down before the school day started. As days passed, I started appreciating the readings, the homily, and the mass songs. I was actively listening and singing, with the words and lyrics touching my heart in a special way. Prayer for Generosity, Take and Receive, Mariang Ina Ko, Huwag Kang Mangamba, and Anima Christi were just five of the countless songs that moved me each time I sang them.

Little did I realize, I was slowly being transformed. I was growing in my faith and spirituality.

The key influencers for me were the Jesuits who led the celebration of the mass. To this day, I still remember their schedule:

Mondays - Fr Mac Reyes SJ
Tuesdays - Fr James O'Brien SJ
Wednesdays - Fr Jose Cruz SJ
Thursdays - Fr Francisco Perez SJ
Fridays - Fr Prudencio Macayan SJ

Fr Mac would wing his homily and still came out lovable. He would just paraphrase the Gospel and add a lesson or two. It was short, sweet, and simple every time, like God smiling and being charming. I came out with a practical lesson after each mass.

Fr OB was mesmerizing for a young Atenean like me. He was an American Jesuit who spoke clear Tagalog, and celebrated the mass in the vernacular. He was like a father to us. He would always have touching personal stories during homily. I would return to the classroom with a full heart, assured of God's love.

Fr Joe Cruz, who was the principal for my entire AHS years, was the best homilist, hands down. He spoke eloquently, his message was well-crafted each time, and his anecdotes were always on-point. Beyond the impeccable delivery was a heartfelt lesson that felt like a father lovingly giving words of wisdom to his son. I took his words seriously every time and came out of the mass a wiser person.

Fr Perez was soothing when he celebrated the mass. He spoke gently like a grandfather. His words of wisdom were deep, yet delivered simply for us teenagers to understand. He didn't use catchy stories, just personal tales we could relate well with. I had always felt that God whispered a nugget of wisdom to sustain me for the rest of the day.

Fr Macayan was the best. He did not give homilies for most of his masses. After reading the Gospel, he would say, "Let's spend a few moments in silence and reflect on the readings," and then he would sit down himself. For the next two or three minutes, everyone would sit in stillness, experiencing God's palpable presence in the air. Silent reflections or insights would overflow, and we would feel God's loving embrace. I knew each time that indeed God was a God of silence.

Aside from the five beloved Jesuits, the other constant in the daily masses was the music.

Every day - almost without fail in my recollection - Lionel Valdellon would be there with his guitar. He would provide the musical accompaniment to the mass songs. He would strum or pluck, and the congregation would sing along. He was one batch ahead of me, so I got to see him almost daily at the chapel for three years.

On Wednesdays, the Dulaang Sibol boys would be there as the choir. Lionel had company. At least three would be playing the guitar; at times, one would play the organ. The songs were sung much louder and more passionately on Wednesdays. I loved it; praying was always better with music, and with more people singing.

That was my mass experience week after week: the Jesuits, readings, homilies, the songs. The weeks turned into months, and the months into four years. Gradually, I had grown in faith and spirituality. I met Jesus in the Holy Eucharist and developed a deep personal relationship with him. He was now Kuya Jess to me.

And while I moved a few meters from AHS to the college grounds in the next four years, went back to AHS for the next five years as a teacher, and finally left Ateneo for corporate life, my love for the mass has remained solid; my relationship with Kuya Jess stronger through the years.

That, my friends, was how I fell in love with the mass. Thank you, Ateneo. Thank you, Jesuits.